Garden of Hope

We transplanted a tomato from our garden bed to a pot a little late in the season. It was shading everything around it and taking over (also, we didn’t know we were supposed to prune it! We are learning). We moved it to its new home and crossed our fingers.  A few weeks ago, I was working in  the garden and I spied a tiny red tomato on our transplant. After a few touch and go weeks, it was producing! There was hope! The concept of hope has been on my mind a lot lately. When I was pregnant with Amelia, I lived in fear of a miscarriage every day until about 24 weeks. Now she’s here, and is the most tiring joy of my life! A month ago, when I saw those two lines I felt….weird but excited. Well okay then, baby two, here we go! I felt cautious, but less afraid this time. My track record was good. Then, things were not okay.  Our miscarriage started on Amelia’s first birthday, what a strange day. We were celebrating our first born, while losing our second. ...

I’m sure many newbie gardeners have had the same thought I had when we planted our garden: “We will never have to buy veggies again!! I’m basically a farmer now!” Then your crops start coming in, and it’s not quite the bounty you envisioned.  I’m sure some weeks we will have carrots and zucchini coming out of our ears, but most days it’s just enough for what we need that night. Isn’t our relationship with God the same way? “The LORD will guide you always; he will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land and will strengthen your frame. You will be like a well-watered garden, like a spring whose waters never fail.” Isaiah 58:11 We have seasons of bounty, fullness, and delight, as if the sun shines fully on us and we feel rooted and strong. We have seasons of struggle, heartache, and sorrow where it feels as if we may never feel the warmth of the sun again. Whatever season you may find yourself in, there is one thing I know to be true, and that i...

I walked 144.81 miles during the “official” quarantine. I walked so many miles that I wore a hole in my shoes, which made me simultaneously proud and concerned about my gait. Walking everyday changed my life. Right before the official lock-downs started in March, I felt like I was finally getting in my stride in Charlotte: I was meeting new people, getting active in stuff with Amelia, and feeling passionate about fitness again. I was “putting myself out there.” I finally felt like I wasn’t floundering as a mother and felt more confident in this calling to stay at home full-time. Then, the isolation began. For some, I know this time was a welcome reprieve in their life, and I held strong for a couple of weeks. I mean, in reality nothing was that different, how bad could it be? Then. Amelia started teething, Sean’s work schedule was insane, and my cousin Mary died. I already felt like I was drowning and when Mary died, it completely gutted me. We couldn’t ...

A few years ago, I started a blog, maybe you remember it, it was called " Beauty from Ashes ." I wrote about how God was healing some deep wounds within me and turning those wounds into hope. Writing brought me back to life. Writing gave me an outlet for creativity and soul searching. I felt connected to God, and I felt connected to the people who read and supported my writing. This past year has been filled to the brim with what feels like every emotion in the book. Through the journey of motherhood, I have experienced a multitude of graces in my life. In my prayers and petitions to God, I have asked Him how I can be a blessing and to let me feel His blessings in my life. I believe my call to writing will be that bridge. Jesus taught us through his relationship with his disciples that you are not supposed to do life alone. Life, in all its glorious highs and lows, is meant to be experienced with each other. Paul says to the Corinthians that we are one body and that there...